Bad Romance

“So I had only just moved to Glasgow from a small village in County Durham and I didn’t really know what to expect from the city based on its reputation. I was walking along Sauchiehall Street, exploring the area, when I saw a man passionately making out with a shop mannequin. He had gathered a small audience of people watching in bewilderment before he just walked away down the street as if nothing had happened. It was only when the shop security started chasing him and the man beside me started clapping when I realised the entire thing had been a distraction to allow him to steal the jacket the mannequin was wearing. I couldn’t have hoped for a better first impression.”